The Bro Code Stories

You know, there has been a couple of times that the bro code has really saved me, especially in Texas. And I'll tell you two. One, I probably shouldn't because, well, I was doing illegal things both times. So one day I was driving. I had a sports car at the time, and I was in Dallas, Texas on Interstate 35. And I was going, I think the speed limit was something like 65 miles an hour. And I think I was going about 120. And so I got pulled over. I was trying to get to the bar to get one last drink with my buddies before last call. It's a very, very smart way of doing it. But I was like fucking 22. And I got pulled over. And I got pulled over by a Texas Highway Patrol guy. So the Highway Patrol in Texas those guys don fuck around Like you don get warnings with them You get tickets or you go to jail or whatever So I remember the guy steps out of his car and it this big black cowboy And he's got his Stetson on and his boots, and he walks over. And the guy's massive. He's probably got like 20-inch arms. And he looks at me, and he goes, why are you speeding? I go, man, I'm not going to lie to you. I'm just trying to get to the bar to have one last drink. and I was pretty decently big. So he kind of looks at me. I kind of look at him and he nods. He goes, all right, slow it down. I'll see you later. That was it. That was it. But it was a bro code moment, right? Because, you know, you're a lifter. I'm a lifter. Okay, we're in this together. Because they would never, never let you off. The second time is I was passing over the Mexican border with a bunch of drugs on me. So I had gone to Mexico and I packed my crotch with Sustanon and veterinary D-ball and Clomid and all this shit. And I'm standing there and I'm shitting my pants because I've got like $2,000 worth of steroids strapped to the inside of my legs. And this was all for me, right? This was going to carry me through the next year. So I wasn't like drug trafficking. to sell to people. This was for my own personal shit. I'm standing there and I'm in line to walk back across and I'm shitting bricks. I'm like, if I get caught with this, I'm fucked. I'm fucked. But again, early 20s, you don't understand consequences in your early 20s. I look up and the guy, the Border Patrol guy looks at me. We lock eyes. Big, massive dude all roided up. I'm looking to him big massive dude all roided up with two thousand dollars with the roids in my crotch he kind of gives me a wink and a nod grabs the two little frat boys in front of me says get on the line come over here we got to check you and sir you come on through and i was like yeah so there are times when the bro code is we're good we're glad to have the bro code right he's like i know why you're crossing this border i cross it also 100 percent