Medication Experiences: Vyvanse vs. Ritalin

and that's why a lot of the medications uh smooth that out um and like if you do like genetic tests i've done genetic testing for for everything so i've got like this issue where i don't make dopamine like normal people i don't transport it like normal people and my receptors don't work so one of the problems of that is it makes you crazy prone for addictive stuff, exercise, food, drugs, you know, work, whatever. So it's like, you're always kind of chasing a dopamine high because you don't actually produce it correctly. So that's why I, even, even the level of advanced, I'm on the, I'm on the highest level you can take at least in Australia. They won't let you have more than that. Now there are some people in America that are, are, you know, being more progressive and trying out much higher levels. There's no way they would ever do that here. Uh, not, not for at least the next 20 years. So I, I supplement with, I got to take shit tons of caffeine. You know, I do like the nicotine mini lozenges. Like, so I have to actually overstimulate myself for to calm myself down. So when and that's kind of the thing that most of the drugs that you'll see, most of them are like amphetamine based. So they're amphetamine based because they smooth you out with the dopamine. So for me, like if you don't have ADD and you took my medication, you'd feel like you were on speed. when I take it, it actually calms me down. Like I've taken a Valium, um, which is a really weird thing to think about, but that's what it does. Um, even like in my party days, um, when we would do, you know, cocaine and sniff a little cocaine, or maybe do a line of meth, I would always be calm. And I didn know why everybody was so hyped up I like why is it This is cool I actually feel normal What going on And I never understood that but I never I also that was before I started getting into like looking at pharmacokinetics and looking all that. And I didn't realize that that's what the Ritalin was doing for me. And that was what the Adderall and that's what the Concerta was doing. And I could not ever stand those drugs. I took them as a necessity to get through school and all that. But I think that those drugs, they're most of them are they're dirty to me they're just they're too they're too potent they're too fast so especially like ritalin and adderall um when i would take that just for context just for context here i'm on a long acting rhythm i've got a short acting i for which was given to me for the days where you you working really hard into night to keep you going yeah i've never taken it i've tried not to um but yeah so just for just for context yeah and say like the like looking at um looking at like ritalin and and adderall when i when i first got on they didn't have long acting most of them were just very short acting you know like three four five hours the only thing i didn't like too is it fucked my sleep up and it fucked up my appetite like i couldn't eat um then they brought concerto which is like a time released ritalin it's like in a little plastic capsule looking thing with a hole on it so that it's kind of, it kind of just leeches out of the capsule over time. And that was okay. But I, it always gave me this weird, dirty, acidic-y feeling. And when I got on Vyvanse, that was a moneymaker. I could take Vyvanse and be totally normal. The Ritalin and the Concert and the Adderall always made me a zombie. So when I would take it, I would have no personality. I would just sit there and just like, I wouldn't talk. You know, I didn't like the way it made me feel. the vivance never had any of those problems so yeah so you can take one of those i'll take one at like six seven in the morning and i'm pretty good until you know five five or six at night um so that's always been the been the one for me it's interesting you mentioned about like taking like stimulants whether that's medications or recreational stuff and and feeling calm like i remember the first day that i took um took ritalin and it was a weird thing because i was i was waiting for myself to be really amped up and hyper i was ready to be really over the top and it was i felt more present it was weird like i was doing my sessions and i was like there in the room with my client i was getting more sessions enjoying my work more because i wasn't thinking about all the things i still need to do like like that feeling of being behind and feeling like oh what do i have to do first i can't be present on what i'm doing because i'm thinking about all those other things all of the time and i remember coming home and list your podcast was um of all people it was diarist with pierce morgan right so i've never i've never had so much focused listening to pierce morgan in my whole entire life but i was just so present in it i was like is this what it should be like all the time i wasn't even aware of that yeah that i think that the way the way i try to explain it to people is that you know when you're not on the medication there's a lot of noise and when you take it it cuts all the noise down like this always this crazy amount of background noise and a lot of times it's like somebody's changing the channel on a tv and they won't stop changing it and it's like just just put it on one channel but it just keeps changing and changing and changing and changing and then when when you take your medication it's like the tv stops on the greatest movie you've ever seen and you can concentrate on it so that's a that's a brilliant into now. Yeah, you know, because I say that I always remember the times like, you know, I sit there and I was watching a beginner 12 week GBC program. And you know, you know, from where we used to work, how could I must be writing 12 week GBC programs, because that's all you ever write. I like so I said, it is a good method, though. I still use it very regularly to this day. But I'm sitting there with this problem. I've written a million of these. I know exactly what I'm doing. If you sat there and tap on the shoulder after what you're gonna write for this client, I go, Yeah, I'll do this, this, this and this. And I sat there I go, the one of the best edges from a YouTube channel called how to ADHD. And it's like, you've got a bridge like an Indiana Jones Temple of Doom style rickety wooden bridge. And you you know, the destination, you know how to get there. And you take the slats out. So you've just got these gaps. And I'm sitting there with this program, I know how to write, but I can't do it. I'm just stuck. I was like, why? This is the moment why I start thinking there's more to this i'm not just lazy or bored so i was like i know how to do this why am i so stuck yeah and that was a bit where my brain was like okay i need to look into this 100