Contribution and Finding Purpose

Too many people nowadays don't think about the bigger picture. Yeah. It's very hedonistic and it's about me, not us as a greater whole. It's like he just said, we need to contribute. People don't care about that. No. They just care about how can things serve me. Yeah, how can things contribute to me. But that's such an ass-backwards thing. Like, even if I'm not going to have kids, fine. I can help people in other ways. I can find a way to contribute. If you're not contributing, what is your reason for even getting up in the morning and doing anything? So, like, I don't think I'll ever retire. Even if I won the lottery, I told people if I won the lottery, I would do what I do for free. I mean I would take a lesser role but I'd pay other people to carry on the message and keep building the business regardless of if I needed the money or not so yeah like I think people that aren't willing to contribute and aren't willing to raise kids to contribute shouldn't have fucking kids and we have too many dumb people having lots of kids and it's a I find it sometimes a cosmic joke about how the people who I see should have kids never have kids yeah the people who should be with people who often struggle to be in relationships, but the ones always giving the advice to be with those who are in relationships. It's some weird cosmic joke. So weird. And I'm not to say I'm this perfect man and whatever, but I'm that individual who's always there giving the guidance to the people in the relationships. But then it's like, when it comes to me, I'm like, what am I doing wrong? A guy like you who is in this pursuit of harmony, is in this pursuit of balance related to yourself, and And the guy that's as smart as you should have kids, right? Because there's a genetic potential there if you find the right partner. You've got to pass that on because people are getting dumber. They're getting dumber. Well I think for health reasons I probably won be able to have kids because of the cancer Yeah But I made peace with that a long time ago And for me contributing is what I do every day How old are you I'm 39. Yeah. Okay. Okay. I always wake up every morning thinking, how can I make someone smile today? That's it. Yeah. Yeah. It's that simple. That's the contribution to the world. How can I make somebody better? How can I drive forward? Because ultimately, what we do in life should be for others. I don't believe there's such thing as a selfless act. Because there's always a return. Even if it makes you feel good, there's a return. There is an equal exchange of something there or an equal loss, depending on how you raise your kid or the situation, right? And I think people hear you should be a father. That doesn't necessarily mean you have to have kids. Because there are programs like Big Brother, Big Sister, stuff like that. You can be a great uncle if you have, you know, I'm a terrible uncle. This is one thing I'm grateful for. I believe, kids, if you're listening to this, I am a great uncle, yeah? Yeah. Like I'm a terrible son. I'm a terrible brother. I'm a terrible uncle. But I have a reason to be, and it's not an excuse because I don't like excuses. But because of my ADD, if something's not in front of me, it doesn't exist. Like I lose stuff all the time even knowing where I put it. If my wife puts something in front of something, it doesn't exist to me anymore. And I tried my best to work on it, but it's so difficult. And that's fine. But I'm at peace with that. I have terrible relationships with people because of that. but at least I know I'm willing to admit I'm not going to be in denial and be like it's everybody else no it's me even my goal in life, my pursuit to make someone smile every day has become it was born out of the pain I went through and the kind of pain I had growing up my parents are phenomenal people, I love them to bits but they only had a limited skill set on how to raise me and they could give me everything that the conventional kids wanted whether it was money or opportunities but they didn't give me what I actually needed but I learned from a young age that that just wasn't their language. So I developed that within me and then I'm driven by that pain to make people smile and make people not feel alone because I know what it feels like to be lonely and to be nothing in a world that's crying out to you every day. So that's the contribution. And you're right, it doesn't have to be my own kids. No. Look, I totally get that. I look at my employees as my kids because other than one of them, I'm quite significantly older than most of them. I look at my students as my kids. Like, how can I help them? These people be better because I'm not going to have kids. And I come from a similar background as you. My background is, like, lower middle class. Dad was working overtime all the time, so he was never around. You know, they did their best to give me whatever they could, like the opportunities. But we weren't like a huggy, huggy, kissy, I love you family. I think I didn't hear my dad say I love you until I was, like, 23 or something. You know, and that's a long time. And my mom said it, but it was like on Christmas and Thanksgiving, holidays. I used to see my other kids, their parents would say it to them every day. Like we just weren't that type of family. So I had a lot of relationship issues and the ability to express love in what should be a normal, acceptable way. It's always been difficult for me. I mean, I'll stand firm with this statement that I believe that the vast majority of men's love language is words of affirmation. Mine, 100%. saying I love them because my dad hasn't said to me yeah if my wife listens to this hopefully she's probably sick of hearing me talk she has to edit all my videos but this is why I go out there try to make others smile and happy because I know what it likes to not have that for my father yeah and I made peace with that because I know he's never going to say it but I'd also be lying if I said I actually made genuine peace because it's still a part of me that wishes but I don't let it consume me basically yeah like that's words of affirmation that's mine like I just want to be told him doing a good job.